Sunday, March 02, 2008

The Rs 60,000 Crore Waiver

The Rs 60,000 Crore Waiver

As a common man I object to the large scale largesse to the agricultural community.
The measeure will not bring any relief to the marginal farmer in the clutches of the private moneylender, it also disincentivises the farmer who is repaying the loan.

While the government may goahead with the proposal, citizens seek to know who the biggest defaulters.

The entire list of defaulters in the descending order of loan outstanding should be published on a website.

Some of the reforms I suggest are-
All new loans should be granted only to PAN holding farmers.
All procurement should be made from PAN-holding farmers.
Farmers earning more than 10 lakhs pa should pay tax at peak personal Income tax rate for all income in excess of Rs 10 lakhs pa.

Monday, January 07, 2008

Why Bhajii is unlikey to have abused Symonds

Bhajji is unlikely to be guily to Racial abuse. That ICC's system of jurisprudence is unlikely to take cognizance of that is a different matter.

Why ?

Harbhajan is an Indian Sardar. In the abuse lexicon of Indians, certain zoological species are frequently used. Monkey, Donkey, Dog et al are some of them. We Indians value birth, parentage,lineage, caste, race and hence abusing one of these is considered a good insult.

Having said that, Bhajji is unlikely to have "racially' abused Symonds, because we Indians do not care what race a foreigner is. They are all 'mlechchas'. Had the abused been another Indian, one might have been tempted to assume "racial abuse". After all, we use abuse castes, don't we.

But Symonds is no Dalit and hence Bhajji could not have cared less whether Symonds was native aboriginal or Black. ( am not sure whether Bhajji can pronounce "aborigine")

And about the monkey business, come on, that was a fair comment !

Friday, November 09, 2007

Jab we mate !!!

While it is interesting to note the mixed use of English and Hindi in modern Hinglish, it can lead to hilarious consequences – like it does when one attempts to read the title for “Jab We Meet” in Devanagiri (Hindi) script.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Notes on that historic Final of the inaugural 20:20 World Cup

The Awards ceremony was an anticlimax. One expected to see a majestic equivalent of the Lord’s balcony host the event. All we got was a bare stage and a balding gentleman to give the award away. Mahendra Singh Dhoni arrived to receive the trophy in a sleeveless banian. Man, Display some respect, that is the World Cup that you will receive.  Woe, it is the Gentleman’s game no more.

 

Shoaib Malik at the awards ceremony, “I would like to thank all the peoples of Pakistan  for their support  I would like to thanks all Muslims in whichever country for their support to Pakistan”.

 

Considering our jubilant mood, we Indians are willing to overlook the rather objectionable remark.

 

Shahid Afridi at the Awards Ceremony, “I would like to congratulate all the Indian nations…” . Duh ?

 

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Sethu righta… ?

The UPA government has deservingly received all the flak for the affidavit on Sri Rama. Having said that the Government’s contention that the Sethu is not man-made has to be conceded. The Sethu was monkey-made with a little but significant contribution from the squirrels (remember what Grandma told about how the squirrels have 3 parallel lines running through their back).
The Sethu seems to have suddenly received religious importance. The question as to what religious and cultural significance the Sethu commands begs to be answered. Does one perform Pooja to the Sethu or visit it and offer ‘baguna’. Do people go in sea diving or snorkeling to pay tribute to the bridge that helped Rama cross the Palk Straits.
While religious, cultural and archaeological heritage needs to be preserved, one wonders whether a particular "monument" which was hitherto neglected develops religious value all of a sudden.
If the "monument" has no other cultural significance but for having been created for Rama’s use I do not see much harm in pulling part of it down to put through a canal ( assuming of course that the canal will bring in untold dividends in the area of shipping and the cost and time savings impact on our exports and imports and supply chain). Admittedly, the Sethu is unlikely to yield benefits akin to what the Canal yielded to Panama or the Suez to Egypt but someone in his right mind can be expected to have done his math.
Considering the economic impact on the Sri Lankan economy and the commercial implications on the Colombo port one might hazard a guess as to the likely promoters of the recent "Stop Sethu" agitation. IF this speculation is to be true, it gives re-birth to the charge of being under the influence of a foreign power, except this time it is neither Congress nor Sonia Gandhi.
The DMK has gone on record with its historical belief. The party which fields Periyar to masquerade atheism as rationalism and believes it is blasphemy (sic) to concede to history.
Let us face it. There are far too many points for the Ramayana not to be true.There are far too many temples littered all over the subcontinent right from Ayodhya in the North to Rameshwaram in the South which are evidence cast-in-stone to the story of Ramayana ( giving allowances for minor regional variations). It would be beyond the capacity of any man (x number of years back in evolutionary history) to have conceived of such a complex seamless story without any loose ends and then visit of each of the places and plant the temples as evidence.
The DMK’s man T R Baalu (the faithful follower of Karunanidhi) sees the Sethu as his chance to be immortalised in the Canal. A fair hope considering that there is little else that can be considered his legacy for all the 11 years that he has been a Union Minister. TR Baalu, the lucky MP from Chennai (South) – the constituency where Yours Truly is a registered voter - has been a Minister for 11 of the last 12 years under 4 Prime Ministers in 5 Governments.

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Mohammed Haneef has offers to join politics and moviedom

Mohammed Haneef has offers to join politics and moviedom

 

*The New Times of New India reports on 30th July 2007:

“Mohammed Haneef, the freed former suspected terrorist landed in Bangalore last night. With the flashbulbs that accompanied his arrival, were new offers.

 

The Samjawadi Party has invited Haneef to join the party and has offered him a Rajya Sabha seat. Meanwhile, competing for Haneef’s attention are the offers from the Telegu film industry. Says one director, ’I have the perfect storyline which fits Haneef to the T. ‘The wronged hero who had done no wrong’. The heroine too has been finalized. The duo would make an interesting couple - She too comes from a similar background - fresh from behind-the-bars. The songs sequence will be shot in awesome Australia and picturesque Portugal. The movie will be released simultaneously in the two countries apart from India and for the only the second time in recent history, in Pakistan.’

 

SIMply amazing, no ?

 

 

* psst…. This report posted on 29th July 2007 is fictional (as on date on writing)

Saturday, July 21, 2007

The Missed Call

The Missed Call

 

One of the ancillary phenomena that arose due to the mega phenomenon called Cellular Phone is the missed call. Yes, The Missed Call.

 

The uses to which the Caller ID based feature on a mobile phones is only restricted by the imagination of the users.

 

Friends and relatives, by arrangement, figure out who has got the most favorable Telephone Tariff Plan. This person is given a ‘missed call’ from others whom he calls back. Of course, there are those who give their folk a missed call, and the receiver calls back from a landline, on most occasions at the employers’ expense.

 

There is the clever set of people who use a missed call to convey binary information. How many of us have said or heard, “Give me a Missed Call once you reach home”. Some of us have used it to convey, “I am waiting outside your home. It is getting late for the movies.”

 

Did I miss the missed call that is meant to remind the receiver that he/she promised to call.

 

While a missed call does not generate any revenue nor cost the subscribers anything, it does have commercial implications. I understand that migrant Bihari workers transfer money to their families via the local moneylender through missed calls.

 

Like the ubiquitous mobile phone, the missed call too has its workplace utility. The missed call that is made to register the act of calling up. Translated that is supposed to mean “I called, but you did not answer the call. Check your Missed Call register for proof.” The objective is to disconnect the line at the first half ring, so that the phone does not alert its owner but just registers the call. The technique is popularly used when the boss asks to be called up over the weekend.

 

Back in college, one of the favorite sports during class hours was the ‘Missed Call Game’.

The guys would call each other in the classroom at random. The objective of the caller was to generate a “Missed Call” in the phone of the recipient rival. The objective of the recipient was to answer the call before it could become a missed call. The Casino type thrill was that the penalty paid in the game was instantaneous. The prepaid balance would drop immediately if the caller ‘lost’.

 

Considering that the number of cell phones per classroom was still in single digits then, it was an involved spectator sport with entire benches backing their representative. Now, I guess, it is possibly an evolved mass sport with several rule variation.

 

And then there is my personal favorite Missed Call that just means ‘I am thinking about you’. Often made late in the evening, when the called party is known to be asleep, it is just to convey to that (mostly special) person, “I am thinking about you”.

 

 

How did you like the post ?